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December 2006 Archives

December 1, 2006

Red Yebisu

redebisu.jpgJapanese beer is great, and (Y)ebisu is the best of the best. And the best thing about Yebisu is that the cans are the same color as the beer. The Gold of the normal brew shines out in such regal glow, and the Black tells you right away that you a have a hearty meal in your hands. This Red is new, but pretty tasty. And yes, the color matches up with the can.

I have been complaining about happoshu for the last three years, but the downward shift in the market to make the cheapest possible beer-flavored industrial blotto-inducer has opened up a hole in the top-end of the spectrum. So now we get Prime Time from Asahi and Premium Malts from Suntory - both excellent. The malt beverage market replicates the stratification of Japanese society: those rich bastards who can still afford to pay 330 yen for a can of beer win big while the downwardly-mobile drink swill and pretend it is real. At least with Hoppy, the ancient working classes were under no delusion that their shochu-cocktail wasn't exactly beer. (I like Hoppy, by the way.)

A word of advice: bring your friends Yebisu when you visit their houses. Bringing happoshu is like bringing them convenience store cup ramen instead of going out to "eat noodles." For December, I recommend the Red.

December 4, 2006

All Behold the Monolithic Beauty of the Mobile Ad Monopoly

We all know that DoCoMo (NTT), au (KDDI), and SoftBank (once Vodaphone) are fierce rivals in the Japanese mobile phone market. So who is behind their cutting-edge campaigns trying to win consumers over to their side at the expense of their enemies?

DoCoMo = Dentsu
au = Dentsu
SoftBank = Dentsu

Yes, Dentsu - the world's largest ad firm - runs the advertising for all three! Not going to see a lot of competitive advertising for mobile phones. Catch copy coming soon:

"Go for a difference with au (different does not necessarily imply better)."
"SoftBank has Cameron Diaz - but au and DoCoMo also have nice celebrities."
"DoCoMo, au, and Softbank - all reliable, world-class communication devices!"

This development may also mean that a single firm controls all the ad space on the three proprietary mobile internet platforms (i-mode, ezweb, etc.), but I have not heard a confirmation on this yet.

Dentsu has been in the news lately for helping Japan's ruling party orchestrate fake town meetings across the country to manipulate public opinion about policy. Not only does Dentsu have a huge hand in creating the country's entertainment and advertising content, the company also finds the time to perform duties as a government organ for national information transmission. (Good trivia for all your dance music fans: Dentsu was also the once-employer for Ken Ishii, Captain Funk, and Moodman.)

Why did rebellious SoftBank go with Dentsu? Details remain muddy, but it is best to remember that SoftBank's goal is to create its own monopoly keiretsu to rival the other huge vertically-integrated conglomerates. And if you're going to play in the big leagues, you have to use the one supplier of chewing tobacco, right?

Over on Mutantfrog Travelogue, anonymous Japanese mass media employee Aceface wrote: "I would say that the real problem in this country is that monopoly taken as a virtue." Indeed. Let us touch the black Dentsu monolith with outstretched arms and progress from apes to tool-wielding men. (Cue one of the Strausses.)

December 6, 2006

Livin' La Vida Loca

Like a bullet to the brain. Oh, how we don't miss the wild days of 1999 and Living "the" Crazy Life. Turns out the crazy girl was actually the color of "cafe latte" come winter, wasn't requesting French Champagne as much as "sparkling white wine" the whole time (we read up), and wasn't into "superstitions" at all - we just didn't know what to call Pentecostal Christianity at the time. Ricky Martin's interest in women has waned anyway.

I had plenty of time to think about this multicultural song "Livin' La Vida Loca" on Monday night since the chain udon restaurant I stopped into decided to play the original version of the song on loop. From entrance to exit, I heard the song six times, and I was basically in-and-out as fast as possible. Perhaps the repetition was audio terrorism to force the teenage girls squatting their real estate at the end of the table to take a hike.

December 8, 2006

Japan: Major or Minor Country?

Famed Neomarxisme insurgent commenter alin wrote the following in our debate about Dentsu (literally, the world's largest ad firm) the other day:

but see japan too is basically a minor country and I'm very politically motivated to support that in whatever way i can whether , whether it's against 'japan as number one' sick japanese or americans who need a fictional arch-competitor in order to function.

While I do not agree with alin's statement, I think he may have just hit at the very crux of the ongoing debate here: is Japan a major country or a minor country?

If Japan is a major country - like the United States or Germany - we have obvious reason to show concern over unchanging political and economic systems in the face of serious social breakdown, the rise of rightism, and the pervasiveness of organized crime, etc. If Japan is a minor country - like Portugal or Albania or Laos - constructive criticism would amount to little more than nitpicky bullying.

My thesis advisor Prof. Merry White once said something like, at the beginning of her academic career, studying Japan was considered to be "anthropology" because Japan was a third-class country, but when the economy bounced back, Japan research became "sociology." The change from tribe to complex society.

Of course, the question of major/minor is interesting because Japan has straddled the line for the last 150 years. First, Japan is a backwater empire closed off from the world. By the early 20th century, however, "minor" Japan defeats "major" Russia and inspires the non-European world that a new era of fighting imperialism is at hand. Then they go so major that they invade China in imitation of major countries, bomb the U.S., and become the strategic partner of übermajor Nazi Germany. When the war ends, Japan goes back to being "minor" for twenty years - finally regaining the underdog sense of rising glory at the '64 Olympics. Then Japan goes from a "miracle economy" to a strong #2 to Japan as Number One to buying major U.S.'s major real estate. Then the Bubble bursts, ten years of recession, a declining population... Does Japan want to gun it again to retain their major status or enjoy the gentle slide into minor territory?

From my perspective, Japan is absolutely a major country: the Number Two economy, a larger population than any of the non-Russian European states, an important producer of electronic goods for the world at large, and a Top Five supplier of pop culture. A symbol of success in Asia, the Japanese model of economic development became successfully adopted in Taiwan, South Korea, Singapore, and Hong Kong. But Japan's retention to what is generally understood as a minor-to-major development state economic model is exactly the issue at hand: when will Japan's economy start to work with the globalized "major" system? Japan has never had the foreign policy influence of a major country - mostly due to being stuck under the American security umbrella. Questions of constitutional revision reference the word "normal country," but they are basically asking the same thing: when will Japan's major status be reflected in the defense structure?

Going minor clearly has its advantages - responsibilities on the international stage tend to go away and everyone leaves you alone (actually worst case scenario, invades you). Nations, however, do not have to be military and economic bullies like the U.S. to be "major." France holds on to its major country status due to its culture and tradition. Germany expertly combines economic superiority with a leading edge on progressive areas like environmental policy.

So, does Japan reform in order to catch up to the other "major" countries? Does Japan proudly sink into "minor" obscurity? Do you protect Japan's minority status as a way to protect the streams of diversity contained within? Do we analyze as compared to other "major" countries in order to understand the barriers that prevent Japan from reaching its economic and strategic goals? Is Japan having it both ways by feigning to be a minor underdog while being #2?

Discuss.

December 9, 2006

Marxy's Guide to DJing Corporate Christmas Parties

Let's keep this short and simple. Don't even bother picking up a pen and paper. You can copy-paste it and print it out later;

1) Always start off with "Ruckzuck" by Kraftwerk. All seven minutes, and no, "Kling Klang" is not a substitute.
2) "Get On the Line" by the Archies, because "Sugar Sugar" is too TV commercial at this point.
3) Eventually get the bpm to a point where you can mix in some leaked LCD Soundsystem tracks.
4) Then bring in Halcali.
5) Definitely play some o.lamm - otherwise the Board will complain to your supervisor.
6) You may play Annie's "Heartbeat" and thinking everyone will go gaga over it, but the suits probably won't even notice that it's on, let alone that there are actual songs in the atmospheric cacophony drifting around the club.
7) Everyone will like "Young Folks" by Peter, Bjorn, and John even if they don't realize it's the song of the last two months.
8) End things with a mashup of Kiiiiiii and Lo-Fi FNK. Everyone loves the Swedes and the Japanese.

December 11, 2006

Wry.

Did you hear about the kid with perfect eyesight who crossed the road?

He got hit by an invisible car.

December 12, 2006

Rich Kids

Although you never hear much about it, Murakami Haruki clearly comes from money. Grandson of a Buddhist priest on one side and an Osaka merchant on the other, he was raised in the upscale Ashiyashi region of Kobe, took seven years to finish private university Waseda, and while still a student, married and started his own jazz bar in Kokubunji. Sometime in the 70s, Murakami decided he wanted to be a writer, and eventually debuted with the short novel Hear the Wind Sing from Kodansha - Japan's most prestigious publishing house. His 1987 Norwegian Wood made him into a superstar - accompanied by (possibly) apocryphal stories of college girls coordinating their daily outfits to match the red and green covers of the novel's first and second volumes.

Although now accepted as "literature," it's important realize that Murakami was first and foremost a pop writer. Old-style intellectuals like Oe Kenzaburo never cared for him. Even Jay Rubin - English translator of Murakami's most important works - took a long time to consider him a serious writer: "In 1989, I read Haruki Murakami. I had only been vaguely aware of his existence--as some kind of pop writer, mounds of whose stuff were to be seen filling up the front counters in the bookstores, but I hadn't deigned to read what was sure to be silly fluff about teenagers getting drunk and hopping into bed." After a while, scholars on both sides of the Pacific finally broke through the Beatles references and unaffected language to find a deep philosophical core to Murakami's work, but for all intents and purposes, the writer started off as a greater influence to Japanese pop culture than to the "high-art" world of Japanese literature.

We should find no coincidence, however, in Murakami's high-standing social background and his success in "low" pop culture. He fits a very specific archetype in the history of Japanese popular culture: the young wealthy son freely and effortlessly producing debut works that become a leading trend within the youth culture.

Another example of this archetype would be Tanaka Yasuo - writer and reformist ex-governor of Nagano Prefecture. While a student at prestigious Hitotsubashi University, he casually wrote out his first novel Nantonaku, Kurisutaru, which not only enjoyed explosive sales in its 1980 first pressing, but was rewarded with the prestigious "Bungei Award." Tanaka's first novel, however, does not approach anywhere near literature. The book - about a wealthy female college student and part-time model - sold as a trendy pop piece, but moreover, as a consumer guide. Each time a store, brand, product, food, club, piece of clothing, university, or other proper noun is used in the narrative, Tanaka (as the narrator, not as the protagonist) supplies a footnote on the left-hand page to introduce/explain the item to the uninitiated. Here was a well-to-do, stylish young man giving away all the secrets to the Tokyo culture game in footnote form, and readers snapped it up as a practical trend guide.

Then in the early 90s, Oyamada Keigo and Ozawa Kenji from Flipper's Guitar pulled the same game: wealthy young men from private high schools instantly winning record contracts and fame right out of high school. Just as Nantonaku, Kurisutaru had a decade before, the two KOs from FG supplied young fans with references to the latest trend - this time in musical form, rather than in fiction.

In all three of these cases, privilege does more than provide idle time and an escape from the compromising chains of fiduciary worries. Wealth and education in post-war Japan meant access to information - especially news beaming out from the West. Both Murakami and Ozawa Kenji mastered English at a young age, which no doubt allowed them to master their command of Western music. Moreover, these four all came from "old money" and not flashy wealth, and in a Bourdieuian sense of cultural capital, they used cultural reference as a way to distinguish themselves from the maddening crowds. Whether wealth allowed greater access to information or not, wealth situated these young men in a certain social ranking that motivated them to protect their position through artistic achievement in fashionably new modes of craft. In the cases of Murakami and Flipper's Guitar, they wrote in intentionally Western styles to differentiate themselves from the baser "Japanese" standards, and the world interpreted this as being more trendy than their common competitors.

In turn, the work of these men was consumed first as fashion and second as art. Their existence lead to "booms" (a consumer phenomenon) rather than "movements" (an artistic one). This basically freaked them out - at least in the long-term. Murakami did not like being a "trendy writer" so much and fled to Europe, then American universities. Ozawa disappeared to NY after cashing-out as a Jpop idol. Cornelius went meta, then "guitar artiste." Tanaka went into anti-establishment politics.

What is frustrating to many Japanese about their stories is the total ease and grace in which they made a huge splash upon the common culture. No struggling, half-compromises of hack jobs, years of toil at candle-lit typewriters.

Sure, there are artists who fit this archetype in other countries and cultures, but US/UK pop culture has a strong obsession with the underdog/underclass achiever - the Working Class Hero. Elvis, the Beatles, Bruce Springsteen, Michael Jackson. What may be the difference between Japan and the U.S. is the sources of cultural creation: in the US, "low ranking" African-Americans were responsible for the jazz, rock, and hip-hop that formed the foundations of the pop culture cycle in the 20th century. This was clearly a bottom-up process - even if the media at the top eventually disseminated/cleaned-up the message. Authenticity originated in the street or in the swamp or on the Delta. In post-war Japan, style and fashion originated so strongly from overseas (mainly American) sources that authenticity - in the case of orthopraxic Japan, something more like high-speed adoption or knowledge of new information rather than an abstract faith-based "being real" - lay squarely with those at the top, since they had either the best education with which to find/translate the American pop culture message or access to the message/materials from trips abroad/connections.

As a defeated culture with an automatic sense of inferiority to the American cultural overlords, pop culture in Japan could not be "bottom-up," and therefore, the wealthy in Japan became the most obvious messengers/idols in shadowy way. Once Japan regained its cultural confidence, "bottom-up" became more widespread. The Murakami-Tanaka-Oyamada-Ozawa Rich Kid model may no longer be as important today, when someone like DJ Ozma or Koda Kumi appears more authentically bound to their respective subcultures. To tie this into bigger streams we often deal with here, the capitalization of the whole gyaru/yankii working-class stream - which in the past was seen as deviation from the mediated "cool" consumer stream - totally outmoded our former archetypes. Cool is no longer monolithic nor solely imported - which no longer gives the wealthy an automatic advantage. Sticking to a deep sense of orthopraxy, culture in Japan generally remains an empty vessel to plaster "fashion" upon - rather than individual works of artistic meaning - but it is used now for a class-based subcultural affiliation rather than for placement in a top-down trend hierarchy. The bottom is proud to be at the bottom - or at least, having fun with the para para.

From an American perspective, the end of elitism should sound like a great development, but practically speaking, most of the bottom-up junk is junk. We may dislike elitism in principle, but the elitist stream in Japan is responsible for most of the country's greatest cultural hits (I want to say this is a Western-bias, but Murakami is huge in Japan). Old money was silent in the past, but now it's dead. The growing nouveau riche is more interested in amassing stuff than showing off the giant logos than flashing the subtle use of expensive silk in their sleeves. (As I write this, the exclusive import sports car shop across the street is loading in a red Ferrari that plays the theme to the Godfather as its horn. No joke.)

My lament about the breakdown of Japanese culture may be a specific eulogy to the elitist causes for cultural creation, but face the facts: the names that light up the concise histories of Japanese pop culture not only enjoyed the beautiful bliss of old money, but prospered specifically because of it. Sure, Nosaka Akiyuki may have had a crazy life of pain and suffering (see Grave of the Fireflies), but he was still the son of the sub-governor of Niigata.

Continue reading "Rich Kids" »

December 13, 2006

Marxy Guest Riff on Riff Market

I did a guest riff about the new Cornelius album Sensuous" on Nick Sylvester's latest blog Riff Market for his "Year in Riffs 2006" spectacular. Neomarxisme readers should be long accustomed to/tired of my attempts to create broad social rationalization for my personal discontent, but it's a fun read regardless.

Kanji Causes Manga: Why?

Japan is a visually-oriented culture.

That makes sense. Why so?

Because of kanji of course.

I don't follow.

Let me quote from Donald Richie's book The Image Factory: Fads & Fashions in Japan (2003):

Some reasons have been suggested for Japan's extreme affinity with this image-making process. One of these maintains that the nature of the written language predicates this disposition, that the kanji, the Chinese ideographs, are in themselves images and are so used by the Japanese, Vietnamese, and South Koreans (kanji are no longer used in North Korea) as well as the Chinese.

Each kanji character symbolizes a single idea. They are logographs in that one character sometime represents both the meaning and the sound of an entire word. In other languages (those constructed in the manner of an alphabet) a repertoire of images is neither required nor possible. Here a certain combination creates a formula - d-o-g = dog, a 'translated' image of the animal name. The same thing occurs in kanji, except that there is no middle step; 犬 at once becomes quan (chu'uan) in Chinese, ken or inu in Japanese. No 'translation' is necessary.

Or, as Frederick Schodt has put it, in discussing manga cartoons, 'the Japanese are predisposed to more visual forms of communication owning to their writing system. Calligraphy... might be said to fuse drawing and writing. The individual ideograph... is a simple picture that represents a tangible object or an abstraction concept, emotion, or action.. in fact, a form of cartooning.

That ends that.

Let me get my head around this: the character for a dog 犬 looks like a dog, so it's like looking at a cartoon for a dog?

Apparently, I can't read Japanese myself.

What about 経常利益? Does that look like "ordinary profit" to you?

I don't know. It could, I guess. I don't know much about the financial world.

When I write the word "dog" do you slowly spell it out d-o-g or do you instantly see the shapes contained in the word "dog" to mean dog and call up the concept in your head immediately?

Yes, but you are missing the point. When the Japanese have to actually write out these kanji, they become cartoonists in a sense. Or at least more sensitive to the visual image.

So in having to write out 慶應 rather than "keio," I gain visual sensitivity.

Yes.

What if I write out the word in script けいおうinstead, does the lack of ideographs reduce my eye for visuals?

I am not sure what you are getting at. Remember: I am just italicized construct in an argument, rather than an actual person.

Forget that for a second. Japanese has both "cartoon" kanji and script-like kana. But China has only kanji. Those guys are all kanji all the time. By this deductive logic, should China not be the world's leading visual culture and the world's most important market for comic books?

I think Chinese people like Japanese comics.

So do Americans, even though they were raised on an alphabet - which clearly lacks the amazingly visual properties of an ideograph system. What I am getting at is, how can we actually test the following deductive logic

A: Japanese uses ideographs
B: Ideographs are more visually-oriented than alphabets
---------------------------- Therefore,
C: The Japanese are visually-oriented

in an inductive manner. Is there a lot of linguistic experimentation backing up this idea?

I will Google that and get back to you.

If someone had asked you 50 years ago if the Japanese would fall in love with hamburgers, you would have probably said no, right?

Their culture is based on fish and vegetables.

Exactly. But hamburgers are now huge in Japan.

It's a shame. But so what?

There was obviously some kind of historical development that happened in between Japanese "not eating beef and bread" to Japanese happily devouring them together with cheese on top.

And if that's the case...

Is the brief pause in your discussion there supposed to indicate at a new paragraph?

Let me finish.

If that's the case with hamburgers, how can we assume that the line between "kanji creating visual sensitivity" and manga/Japanese design culture was a straight path? Should we not look more closely at the specific development of the art form in a broader, reality-based method? Manga is a consumer item, a form of media. How did it become so popular? How was it distributed? How was it purchased? What were its alternatives and substitutes?

Yeah, but I'd rather just build theories around semi-deductive analysis of general Japanese traits I assume to be permanent and unbending.

God, it's like I am putting the exact words I want to hear you say directly into your mouth.

A Bad Year for Good Dogs

R.I.P. まさお君

Akasaka Adventures, Vol. 4

After I passed out at my company physical (I suffer from serious low blood pressure problems when needles go into my arms), I went out to find nutrition (patty melt and milk tea) at the local Manna Niller's (not actual restaurant name). Oddly, this American style diner is the frequent meeting place for some yakuza or yakuza types (Akasaka is Sumiyoshi territory), and as I went in, there was a black stretch limo parked out front and a white Toyota with two sunglassed black suiters standing guard. Usual story. My guess is they go for the obscenely top-heavy waitress outfits and stay for the overpriced cafeteria pie. The two bosses left at the same time towards the end of my meal, although I did not see them go out - I just noticed the cars drift away.

When I left, however, a large-sized silver Rolls Royce (or perhaps, a Bentley) pulled around where the white car had been. Two drivers jumped out, pulled an umbrella out of the trunk (which was also filled with what looked like bags of DVDs and manga-sized books graced with a male celebrity's face), and then ran to the back door. While covering the space outside of the door with the umbrella, the driver frantically explained positions to someone on his mobile phone: "We're on the left directly after the intersection."

The passenger finally got out, protected from the rain by the umbrella provided, which he took in his own hands. He was about 5'5" or so, frail, 30-35 in a rather respectable tailored suit. Nothing too "organized" if you know what I mean (organized crime). He walked to the other side of the car in a young, sheepish way, looked around, but appeared perfectly comfortable with the idea of holding his own umbrella.

Then suddenly, a black luxury BMW sedan pulls up and stops basically in the middle of the road. The driver gets out, and opens the back door. The car is covered in all sorts of antennas oddly. The small suited man gets in, the driver closes the door, and the car speeds off.

I stop pretending like I am waiting for someone outside and stumble back to work before realizing my loss of consciousness sucked the life out of me.

December 14, 2006

Non-Alphabetical Character of the Year for 2006

The Non-Alphabetical Character of the Year for 2006 has been selected: &. The Committee decided on & due to the year being host to "multiple events." Chairman of the Committee explained, "So many things happened in 2006. This and that and this and that other thing. We felt like & was the obvious choice to represent the vast number of unrelated events that transpired over the last 365 days."

Runners-up included # (society's obsession with celebrity rankings), @ (the rise of the internet), © (the battles over copyright), (the rise and fall of Christianity in politics), Ω (a new interest in horseshoes among young people), and (some squiggly lines).

December 15, 2006

Nintendo's Failure: Wii Way Not Meta Enough for My Century

Famed Astronaut Rolf von Ostrauch once quipped in his hilariously-stereotypical German brogue, "The Earth looks so quaint once you've been [sic] the moon." If the PS3, Wii, and Xboxx360 are the 新世代ゲーム (next-century consoles) they are cracked up to be, God should be currently painting a thick chalk line between those lucky few who have experienced the future and those laggards who are free to plug as many PS2's into the wall sockets inside their caves as they please but fundamentally will never understand tomorrow today. On Tuesday, I played a Wii for the first time, and #$'(!"#'%#(%#%'(! #'(!"$FHD(#! $(!#$( - a phrase I can proudly say will make no sense to any of you yet to embrace the leather grip of the Wii controller. (For those longtime Wii players out there, sorry for all the cursing.)

The game I played on Tuesday - something involving pumping juice at rabbits from Ubi - was alright and all, but I realized how boring it will be to play the catalog of old NES titles on the Wii. Remember when games had austere titles wasting no words other than a one-word description of the actions involved? Baseball, Tennis, Golf, Pro Wrestling? Even Ten-Yard Fight feels like a leap of imagination in comparison. Somebody from Rockstar should have the balls to call the next GTA just Adventure instead of GTA: Good Morning, Heavy Metal Valley or whatever it will ultimately be.

The point is, Wii lets you purchase these old-timey games and play them on your HDTV (not in HD format). This is boring. This makes the gamer go back to the crusty old barnacle days of yore when kids sat down and played games motionlessly other than slight use of the arm and hand. WE ARE OUT OF THE CAVE NOW, Nintendo. (Sorry, I had my earphones in.) We are out of the cave, Nintendo, and we want these games adapted for full-body usage.

So, I recommend the following: all these "vintage" games should show a young boy about 8, who looks pretty much like me at age 8, sitting in the basement on the floor, eyes focused on a slightly old/broken TV playing Baseball. My Wiimote will be used exclusively to control the boy's movements that control the game actions in Baseball.

If you want to make it really challenging, make the refresh rate on the real TV and meta-TV different so that it's hard to see exactly what is going on.

December 18, 2006

Krispy Kreme: Only Southerners Can Criticize

Glazed donut makers Krispy Kreme opened in Japan last Friday, and although lines were full of peacefully-exuberant locals, dissent is brewing stronger than the accompanying coffee. "Krispy Kreme donuts are too big and too sweet...Mister Donut donuts keep better in terms of taste," says KBC Securities analyst Kyomi Ando.

These sentiments are echoed all across the blogocube - everyone complains and moans about the "sweetness" of KK donuts, as if donuts were a nutritious part of the balanced diet before the Winston-Salem-based company diabolically dipped them vats of corn syrup.

The problem with all these hostile opinions is that none of the speakers are from the Southern United States. Krispy Kreme is a "Southern thing" - and like the t-shirt proffers, "you wouldn't understand." When I grew up in Northwest Florida, I had to pass the KK on the way to school everyday, and you better believe that I swerved my car from Cervantes St. into the KK parking lot when I saw the "HOT DOUGHNUTS NOW" sign flashing. (I generally like the kruellers which are good hot or cold, although they get considerably less attention than the glazed ring. Chocolate-covered white cream-filled is also good - not to be confused with the chocolate-cream filled, which is great. Chocolate-covered chocolate cream-filled crosses that line between paradise and madness.)

Krispy Kreme are a product of Southern culture, and I find it terribly rude, inconsiderate, academically-suspect, neo-conservative, universalist, and terribly rude to make judgments on OUR culture, which we have been very generous to open up to the rest of the world. We are saving Cheerwine for a 2010 global rollout, but we better not catch you badmouthing that either when the time comes.

Now practically speaking, I only lived in the South for around 12 years (3 in MS, 9 in FL), which means my Southernness Index (SI) is only 42.86. So if I judged Krispy Kreme as "10 out of 10," which I certainly would, the SI modifies my judgment, meaning the weight of my final critical pronouncement within this discussion is 4.29. That's not exactly a massive vote of confidence in the scheme of things.

But for all those other critics.... I doubt Kyomi Ando has ever lived in the South (a big fat 0 on the SI). Her opinions are thus worth 0.

Since opinions about cultures other than your own are invalid and worthless, and frankly speaking, terribly rude, I recommend you don't even open your mouth to make sounds that could be construed as negative statements. Fill that mouth with glazed lard instead.

December 19, 2006

The Forty Year-Old Virgin's Global Cool

maruiyoung.jpg

On the left is an image currently used in Marui (OI) department store's Christmas campaign. The model is Ikeuchi Hiroyuki, who plays the lead role in a special tie-up short drama series available on the Marui website. The story 「クリスマスの約束」(The Christmas Promise) deals with fixing broken music boxes, making cake, and absolutely, positively finding love on Christmas Eve. Actually, it's a pretty non-commercial message for what is ultimately a commercial advocating the general purpose consumption of items. Although Christmas in Japan is a "romantic holiday" - opposed to the "family holiday" emphasis in the U.S. - both advocate material exchange as close communication. The difference is that lonely Americans rarely try to desperately put together a family to properly celebrate, whereas it's a running joke that Japanese girls work hard to meet boys in the Advent season lest be alone on the Eve night. (Many guys then get the tsukaisute treatment come New Years.)

Ikeuchi's portrait now towers over Shibuya, and I couldn't help but notice that his overall posture and expression strike a strange resemblance to the promotional poster for 2005's The 40-Year-Old Virgin. What an odd thing to inflict pakuri upon. Or is there something universally endearing about dippy-looking men wearing collared shirts and looking to the viewer's upper left with a blithe, toothy smile?

December 20, 2006

Marxy on Hysteric Glamour in Nylon Guys

I have a rather long profile of Nobu Kitamura - designer/founder of classic Japanese street brand Hysteric Glamour - in the Winter 2007 issue of Nylon Guys (on newsstands now!), thus completing my coverage of the Holy Trinity of Japanese Street Wear (Nigo, Jonio, and Nobu).

December 21, 2006

Year in Music 2006

Last month, I downloaded a torrent entitled "Only 20 Tangerine Dream Albums." Only. I divided them by date, threw the post-'81 contents in a hidden folder, and now have hours upon hours of background music for reading and working. I had been fiercely resisting the relegation of music to BGM, but at least I finally understand why people get so drawn to Riow Arai or Cluster or whatever.

All that 2006 young indie band stuff: can't get into it, blends together too much like Phaedra and Ricochet - maybe even Rubycon. Someone gave me Tapes N. Tapes, and my iPod just automatically switched over to Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain instead. I blame the technology for the easy avoidance of contemporary, yet inferior products.

2006, however, was the year I could finally channel my age-old obsession with Jenny Lewis into the music sphere. Before now, I had been buying old SLP recordings of Brooklyn Bridge off eBay. I actually checked my email next to her at Fuji Rock, which I could guess is as exciting as eating in the same cafeteria as Jens Lekman or having the same hairdresser as Connor Oberst, except I have no idea who that last person is. As much Faust as I listened to this year, I secretly wanted songs to sing along with, and "Rise Up with Fists" and "You Are What You Love" were extremely satisfying in this regard - despite Ms. Lewis' habitual resignation to rhyme a word with itself.

Unlike everyone else in the entire world, I couldn't bring myself to enjoy the The Crick Watsons album, and yeah, I know who produced it. Call me a hater, but there is something very toxic about this whole promotional climate, where bloggers might as well be on the Girlie Action payroll. (Wait, I'm a blogger too. This is like the pot calling the Ketel One a drug.) Regardless, unlike my peers, I could not get into Seven Pack, Chedd, Like a Like, Minty Quintet, Kambodia, The Flag, nor Pretend You Are Here. Nor Sophie's Choice, Lionel Hutz (how many more Simpsons band names will there be?), The Golden, Bumblebee Man, and Fast Car.

If the album is dead, someone forgot to tell The Telegraphix - who released one. I liked "Radio on the TV" as a single, but it kinda dates yourself to comment on a contemporary band in real time.

I could complain about YouTube-mainstays Yes Maam being all visual and no audio, but this criticism has been shrill and redundant ever since MTV rolled into town. In Yes Maam's case, however, their silent clip started an aggravating trend where the video was free, but you had to buy the music separately. I hope to see a lot less of that in 2007.

The other day I considered purchasing a CD for the first time in about five years only to find that the prices have not dropped recently - even though the market is completely disintegrating. (Toshiba got out of Toshiba-EMI, which could not be a good sign.) HMV had the Klaus Schulze CD I wanted for 3990 JPY, which I would like to say is "X-times the amount I want to pay for it" except that X is an impossible number since you can't divide 3990 by 0. In most shrinking markets, the prices go down: I don't think the Virtual Boy kept getting more and more expensive the less units Nintendo could sell. But labels can't catch up to consumers here: the macro-psychological value for music has already plummeted to near zero. There's too much of it, and it's too readily available for free. Anyone who actually bought a CD this year should win an award for their impressive commitment to charity.

Densha Otoko: Finally Interviewed!

In the January 2007 issue of Wired there is an article "Love Train" about our favorite "true love story" 「電車男」(Densha Otoko). Writer Brian Ashcraft gets a special interview with the "man" behind the phenomenon. Not in person, of course. Observe:

Some say he's real, others insist he was cooked up by some clever 2Channel posters. The book's publisher, Shinchosha, agreed to set up an email interview with Train Man, but acted as an anonymizing go-between.

"I don't think I could've done it without 2Channel," writes Train Man, who says he's still dating the pretty girl. So far, his life hasn't changed much: He works at the same company, visits Akihabara, buys comics, and watches anime. And, of course, he still posts about stuff like videogames on 2Channel. Once an otaku, always an otaku.

An anonymous email interview arranged by the publisher? Why was I ever skeptical of this story at all?! Besides the myriad reasons to doubt the Train Man story offered on the Japanese wikipedia, I find it most hard to believe that couple are still together and "dating." He better marry that girl soon. It's not like a totally fabricated fairy tale happens to you every day.

Also, our man appears to have been totally taken on the licensing contracts: a best-seller, a film, a hit drama, etc., etc. and he still works "at the same job."

If the Train Man is fake (and c'mon, is there any evidence that he exists other than the word of the stakeholders profiteers?), serious balls on Shinchosha to basically make up responses and send them to an American magazine as authentic.

About December 2006

This page contains all entries posted to neomarxisme in December 2006. They are listed from oldest to newest.

November 2006 is the previous archive.

January 2007 is the next archive.

Many more can be found on the main index page or by looking through the archives.

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